The moment we've all been waiting for....

So months of planning, changing plans, freaking out about price of airfares, finding awesome airfares, researching tours, accommodation & other activities... it all comes down to this... 2 sleeps to go! Unfortunately I wasn't upgraded to business or premium economy for my flights to Vancouver but I have managed to change my aisle seat in the middle of the plane to a window seat for my Vancouver to Auckland flight on the 18th September which I am happy about.

Ok so the itinerary goes a little something like this:

3rd Sept - Brisbane to Vancouver
4th Sept - City Snapshots Tour of Vancouver
5th Sept - Free Day - Aquarium & Grouse Mountain
6th Sept - Day trip to Whistler
7th Sept - Laundry (very important!) and Hamlet at Bard on the Beach (can't wait for that one!)
8th Sept - Cruise begins
9th Sept - Cruising the Inner Passage
10th Sept - Stop - Icy Strait Point
11th Sept - Hubbard Glacier
12th Sept - Stop - Juneau
13th Sept - Stop - Ketchiken
14th Sept - Cruising the Inner Passage
15th Sept - Cruise ends.  Transfer to Victoria
16th Sept - Butchart Gardens & Butterfly Gardens tour
17th Sept - Free day - wander around Victoria Harbour
18th Sept - Begin the long journey back to Brisbane
19th Sept - Flying
20th Sept - Auckland to Brisbane

So there you have it.. not much detail I know but that is pretty much how my time is gonna be spent.

What am I looking forward to the most?

• Seeing the Hubbard Glacier for sure!
• Finally getting to Victoria
• There is a bit of a possibility that we may see the Northern Lights on the 11th (http://www.gi.alaska.edu/AuroraForecast/Alaska/2013/09/11).  This website shows the Aurora forecast for while we are on the cruise and the 11th is a good possibility if we have a clear night.  Now THAT would be a tick on the bucket list!

I'm still not as excited as I think I should be but it is slowly coming.  I think because I know tomorrow at work is going to be so full on that I won't have time to think about that fact it is my last day for nearly 3 weeks!  I guess it will come to me tho... I am looking forward to the trip and being somewhere different tho :)

Hmmm....

Why aren't I more excited about this trip?  I mean it is only 10 sleeps away and I am like "Meh" when I think it about it.  Of course that's not what I'm like when I talk to people about it... then it's like "OMG 10 SLEEPS TO GO!!!!!"

Don't get me wrong, I am excited.. just not EXCITED!!!!!  I can't quite put my finger on why either.  I mean I am looking forward to going to Vancouver, it is a place I've wanted to go for a while.  I am looking forward to going on the cruise to Alaska - I mean who wouldn't!?!?!?  And I am looking looking forward to spending a few days in Victoria.. the more I see photos of the place the more I would love to see it.

But there is something in me, something I can't quite fathom that is just not as excited about this trip that I have been about ones in the past.  Someone asked me if it was because I didn't really want to go to these places and I think it was something that might have struck me.  None of these things are Bucket List things for me... I mean I want to go to these places but I am not really ticking off anything on my bucket list (unless I am lucky enough to see the Northern Lights on the cruise).

With the places I have been in the last 3 years when I have gone on these trips, there were places that were on my bucket list: London, Great Ocean Road, New York & D.C all featured on my list and I am glad I have ticked them off but this time it is more a holiday of convenience than anything.  What was going to be a week in Vancouver has turned into a 3 week holiday all because my friend suggested I go on the cruise with them.  I guess it wouldn't have been something I would have done on my own and who knows when I might have had the opportunity to do an Alaska Cruise otherwise.

Now... all of this is not to say I won't enjoy myself!!  I mean lets face it.. if I am out somewhere, anywhere taking photos then I am a pretty happy person (even if I don't realise it at the time and have to wait till I am home looking at the photos a'la NYC!).

I guess time will tell.....

I love it when a plan comes together.....

So this time in 50 sleeps I will be sitting in Auckland airport waiting for my connection to Vancouver after a 3.5 hour flight from Brisbane.  After about 6-7 months of changing plans, ditching things, being convinced it would be a good idea to do something else and playing out loads of money, I finally have my itinerary set in stone...

On the 3rd Sept I will be departing Brisbane for Vancouver via Auckland on Air NZ and spending 5 nights in this Canadian city.  I hope to head up to Grouse Mountain, go to the aquarium, see a Hamlet play at Bard on  the Beach and roam the streets of Vancouver.  Then I join my friend, her husband and young child on a 7 day cruise up the inside passage to Alaska where we will be viewing glaciers and hopefully whales & the Northern Lights (if we are REALLY lucky).  From there I head to Victoria for 3 nights to take in that beautiful part of British Columbia before heading back to Brisbane on the 18th Sept.

My plans have changed and changed again.  I was originally going to go via Christchurch so I could spend at least part of my mum's birthday with her but unfortunately airfare prices being what the are, it was a little too expensive to do that.  So I am going to send her a HUGE bunch of flowers instead and now because of the prices of flights, I actually get 4 extra days in BC so I get to spend more time in Victoria rather than doing just a day trip from Vancouver!  So I guess all in all it has worked out quite nicely - well for me anyway.. those at work will have to suffer without me for a few extra days... Which it looks like they will have to do for my next year's holiday too :)  But more on that later...

I am really looking forward to this holiday.  I have heard so many good things about Vancouver, Victoria and the cruise we are doing too.  None of these places are really places that I MUST see or go to but I am looking forward to getting away and doing something different to the norm.  I still need to decide what (if any) tours I am going to do in Vancouver but I think for Victoria I am just going to do the hop on hop off bus and also just booked a tour out to Butchart Gardens - which by all accounts is a must see place!  In Vancouver I really want to go to the Aquarium and I have just purchased my ticket to go see Hamlet at the Bard on the Beach in Vanier Park... can't wait for that one!!!

I have also just booked a day trip to Whistler - I wasn't going to but then I figured.. if I didn't then I would probably regret it and when am I going to head back there again??  Anyway, it's done now so I can't take it back :D  Other than getting hop on hop off tickets & the aquarium, I think everything has been paid for!  So that's a bonus... all my money now can go towards spending money .. I am looking forward to this very much!

Here we go again

Ok so I've done it again.... I have started planning another trip before I have even started my next one.  To be fair though 4 days in Christchurch takes care of itself, 3 days in Vancouver - really not much to add and a 7 day Alaskan Cruise is all inclusive (apart from some shore tours) so my planing skills have not really had much of a work out with my next trip.

So where am I going I hear you ask?  Um well.. I think you know where!!!

Yes that's right London

I have been wanting to go back to London since I visit 2 1/2 years ago and have planned many trips that I haven't taken!  So I thought it was about time I went back... I would also like to go to Edinburgh and York but I will have to see how my finances hold out.  I would definitely like to do York because of my idea for the trip...

Dad's birthday is 1st May and I always like to do something on that day as something special.  In the past I have been to the Brisbane Maritime Museum, Newstead House and this year I had a delayed day when I went on the Weka Pass Railway when I was home mid May.  So next year I am thinking of doing something extra special.. and that is to be in Greenwich on the 1st May. That is a definite but other than that I have about 2 weeks to fill in.

I would like to go to York because when I was little Dad use to  sing "The Grand Old Duke of York" whilst bouncing me on his knee.  Ever since I was that little girl, I have always wanted to go to York.  It wasn't until years later that I found out about York Minster and it cemented my resolve to go there.

I am so excited to go back to London tho.. I think people get sick of me going on about how much I loved it... haha.  I will be staying in a completely different part of the city - Whitechapel, about 5-10 minutes walk from the Tower of London!  The only issue is that I have been watching the English show Whitechapel - about many historic murders from that area that have been recreated.  Of course there is the infamous Jack the Ripper murders so yes... I feel completely safe!!! I am looking forwarded to staying in a different part of the city and exploring something new.

Let the countdown begin.... 318 sleeps!

No Regrets... They Don't Work

Have to admit.. No Regrets is not my favourite Robbie Williams song, but he has it right... Regrets just don't work.

I mean you can't go back and change the thing you regret doing or not doing so what's the point of worrying about it or even thinking about it again.  What's done is done and nothing is going to change that...

Ok so sometimes you can change some things... like for example, I now regret not going to the Empire State Building when I was in NYC last year.  That's ok because I know I will go to NYC again and I will be able to go the Empire State Building then... no biggie...

But I can't change the fact that I wish I had spent more time with my dad before he died.  Oh how I wish I could change that period of my life but I can't and I have to live with that now.  There is no point worrying about it, I know my dad loved me and he knew that I loved him and at the end of the day that is all that matters.

I don't regret for one second jumping on that plane nearly 4 weeks ago and flying home so see my sick mother... I know that if I didn't and the outcome wasn't as good as it was then I would regret THAT decision more!  People tried to tell me not to go, "there's nothing you can do" was a common comment... you know what tho, I felt so much better for being there for two weeks and watching my mum get stronger every day.. I learnt in that time that my mum is seriously one of the most inspirational people on the planet!  She is strong and resilient and I wish I was more like her... a lot of people who were in her situation would have given up but she didn't and she is proving every day that if you believe in yourself, then you will get there.

Your life is defined by the choices you make.. sure along the way you will make the wrong choices but hey, that's what being human is all about.  If everything went perfect every time, you wouldn't have the experience to know a bad decision when it happened.  Gut feelings are a powerful thing, but you gotta be listening to your gut in order to follow it.

Yes, sure I have LOTS of regrets... I regret not doing better in school, I regret I didn't lose weight when I was younger, I regret not going to the UK in my twenties.. one thing I don't regret is moving to Australia - I know some people might think differently because of my recent comments but I have enjoyed my time here and I have made some amazing friends who will friends for life no matter where we are in the world.  My relationship with both my parents grew considerably because of this move and I know that when I go home in a years & half time that I will be a different person, a stronger person.  I could never regret that...

I also do not regret my decision to leave Australia.  I knew from the moment I arrived in Brisbane that I was never going to be here for the rest of my life.  I always knew that I would end up back in Christchurch and even though over the years it has been harder & harder to leave when I go home to visit and there have been times such as my father's death, the Chch quakes and my mothers health that have made me want to go back sooner and I glad with my decision to go back next year.

Someone I respect a lot once said to me "Don't make emotional decisions" and I have held true to that... it would be easy to go home earlier but I have a plan and I need to hold fast to that plan because if I don't... I might regret it....

I definitely believe that things happen for a reason, sometimes the reason doesn't just jump up and smack you in the face; sometimes it's more of a subtle nudge but there is always a reason - for all the good & bad that happens! You just have to believe that one day, hopefully sooner rather than later, that reason will show itself and you will be "Oh of course!!!!!  It all makes perfect sense now!"

Don't regret the decisions you made.. they have led you to where you are right now, which is exactly where you are meant to be.

I wish...

I love writing and taking photos and always thought my perfect job would be travel writer & photographer.  But now I see that it wouldn't work... 3 things are wrong with that dream:

1)  I can't write... I mean I can write but I don't think I can write well.  I don't think I have the talent to draw people into my writing that some people have.  I don't use the right words sometimes and I abbreviate when I shouldn't but that's just who I am.  I was told once that I write the same way I talk - not sure if it was a compliment or not.. haha.  I try to get my point across with writing but I think you lose something, especially when you have never met the person whose writing you are reading.  Anyhoo... I don't think I could write for a living because I don't think I have the talent for it.

2)  I know people out there would say I am a good photographer... well here's the rub... I am not a photographer, I just happen to be a person who takes photos.  Sometimes it works but most of the time it doesn't!  Thankfully because of this digital age I can take 200 photos and I might be lucky to get two decent ones out of it.  I see a lot of errors with my photos, like the composition being off - too be honest I don't even know what composition is... haha.  I guess I am lucky with my photography... actually most of my "really good" photos are actually flukes!  Also I think that taking photos has a kind of a big amount pressure added to it.. I mean with writing if you get it wrong, you can edit it but with photos once you have taken it, that's it... no more!  I mean you can edit it somewhat but at the end of the day you are still going to have the photo you have taken.  I don't think I could stand up to that kind of pressure.

3)  Now travel... in all honesty I have not been that many places around the world. Yes I have traveled throughout NZ and some places in Australia but I have actually only been to 4 other countries - Vietnam, which I didn't really like and can't see myself going back to; UK and that was only to London and the South West - Loved it but need to go back for more; France - well 3 days in Paris isn't probably the best testament to actually saying I visited France; and the US - again only a couple of places so can't really gauge the country on the 4 places I went..   Also I require a certain amount of comfort when travelling... such as - no hostels for me!!  I prefer at least a 3 star hotel (mind you some of those are not much better than hostels!). Also I am not a 'do anything for a story' kind of girl when it comes to travelling.  I know what I like and that is history & architecture... I loved the colonial buildings of Philadelphia, pretty much everything about London - St Paul's, Temple Church, Greenwich, Houses of Parliament etc and the pretty little villages with their own history throughout the South West of England.  When I went to the British Museum, it wasn't the Egyptian history that fascinated me as I thought it would be.. it was the Greek & Roman.

I guess that what I am saying is that whilst dreams are free, you need to be realistic about what it is you are dreaming about.  I am 40 years old and I am no closer to knowing what I want to do with my life than when I was 20. Sometimes it can be quite depressing watching family & friends discover their dreams and pursuing them but sitting back thinking "what is my dream?"  Don't get me wrong, I love that they have discovered what it is they want to do and a chasing that dream, but I just wish sometimes my dream would stand up and smack me in the face and say "Hey, you should be chasing me!"

Enough said really :)

So it's March and I have been back to Christchurch technically every month this year.  Two weeks in January for a friends wedding and I had an awesome time visiting old haunts - well those that were left!  Then a couple of weeks ago my mother had to have an operation - long story short, after two operations and various days in ICU she is on the mend, thankfully but it was touch & go there for awhile.  I ended up going back to Chch to visit mum and ended up staying two weeks.

This time however, whilst still a good time, I didn't go out too much.  Much of the time was spent at the hospital, home or family member's homes waiting for news.  I even felt bad going to the mall because I wasn't there to enjoy myself!

Dad's Lily 

One day we did go out was on the 23rd February - this was the 5th anniversary of my dad passing away.  My sister, niece, great niece and myself took a lily to dad's memorial plaque and then went to the Botanical Gardens for a picnic and to visit the Festival of Flowers.  We then met two of my brothers, sister in law & little nieces for a play at the playground and then dinner at their place.  All in all it was a great day despite the reason behind it. 

Peacock Feather

Pink Roses in the Roses Garden