Music

So, I was was just writing in my journal saying how I wish I could just pick up a song and put it in my journal because you can write the lyrics but sometimes you need the music to go with it... then I thought - 'Hey, I have a blog, why don't I just post it in there!!"...


So, here it is  - Life is Beautiful by The Afters.  I love this band, have only really discovered them in the last few months but I love their music.  This song is in the movie October Baby, which I haven't seen but it is on my list of movies to watch.  I just love this song - I love the lyrics, I love the music.  It really is a beautiful song about how life really is beautiful and it's those little moments that make it beautiful..


My favourite line: 

"These are the things that make us feel alive

These are the times that make you realise"

Sometimes....

Sometimes I wonder if any of it is worth it in the end and why I am bothering now... no this isn't a cry for help, it is a statement of fact.

Case in point - Me... I have no partner, no children, no pets, no house, nothing really that stands out to say "Here I am, this is MINE".  It is a pretty depressing thing to realise that you are nearly 40 and you are one of  the only one of your friends that is currently single.  I'm talking close friends - not the friends you have on Facebook or similar because you know someone in common or knew them way back when.  But those close friends that you would tell anything to - or pretty much anything.

Maybe I am going through a midlife crisis.. with my 40th looming faster than a speeding bullet, it stands to reason that I would start questioning my own existence... The problem is that when I look at myself in the mirror and ask "What do you have to show for yourself?" the answer is not much of anything.

Don't worry, I am not going to hurl myself off the nearest bridge because I am sad with what my life has turned out to be so far.  Firstly the Thistle Street Bridge isn't that high and I would end up just breaking something as opposed to doing away with myself - then I would have to add the fact that I can't even kill myself to the growing list of things that I haven't accomplished in my life.  Secondly am I really that selfish that I would do something like that to my mum?!?!?  No!!!!

I know that when I look at my life it seems like I don't have much - but in actuality I have a lot!  I have a roof over my head, I have a pretty good paying job, I have never gone hungry, I have never missed paying my rent, I travel pretty much wherever I want and I don't have to answer to anyone about it.. but the most important thing?  I have control of the remote control!  No.. but seriously.  I have a lot in my life that I can be and am grateful for, but I do sometimes look and see that the grass might be greener over there.  I mean, doesn't everyone at some point

So in closing - just so everyone is clear... this is a care of the "poor me's" not a case of  "I am going to do away with myself"... I might be selfish in some respects but I would not put my friends and family through the anguish of not knowing why.

Midlife crisis??  Maybe I should just buy myself a shiny red convertible instead!

Over & out... but not for good :)

When did that happen?

Just read over my last post and it mentioned that there was 7 weeks till my cruise... ok well as of tomorrow - there is only TWO WEEKS!!!!  Holy Moly time has flown.. although it didn't really seem like it at the time.

I think I am pretty much organised, just got to get insurance but other than that every thing is done.  I just need it to be now!  I am so over work at the moment and the constant "I need help", "I need things to do", "Have you got a minute, I just need you to stand behind me for 20 minutes whilst I write an email that I am going to send you anyway" that comes my way.  I sometimes wonder if anyone there thinks I have anything better to do than wait on them hand & foot

But hey.. only 15 sleeps will my first holiday of the year.  Very excited!  I have booked a shore tour in Lifou to take me to the other side of the island.  No one else has booked on so it will definitely be some "me" time.. and the other people who booked the same tour of course :)  Since I have never been to a South Pacific Island, I really have no idea what to expect - I know that "technically" NZ is a South Pacific Island but you know what I mean.

I wish I had some exciting news that has happened over the past 5 weeks (really didn't think it had been that long, but there you go), but unfortunately nothing exciting has happened - oh wait, I became and aunty for the umpteenth time just before Easter, so that's exciting.  But nothing that has happened to me... Hopefully when I write again I will be able to share some exciting news & photos :)

Itchy Feet...

“Once you have traveled, the voyage never ends, but is played out over and over again in the quiestest chambers. The mind can never break off from the journey.” – Pat Conroy

This is so true. It has been 15 months since I embarked on my first trip to the UK and there hasn't been many days where I haven't thought about that trip. I might be reminded if I see a poster of London or Paris; or if I see a Union Jack (which, FYI, I have fallen in love with - I want a Union Jack Room!!!!). I dream about going back to London & seeing more of the UK. I regret the things I didn't see (Westminster Abbey!! I know.. time got away from me), and I think about the things that I really want to see again (pretty much EVERYTHING!!!).

Now I am in the midst of planning my trip to Honolulu & NYC and I wonder if I am too much of a planner. I like planning, I really do but on my trip to the UK I found that the things I didn't plan for turned out to be the best days (not that I had a 'bad' day!). I have 8 nights/7 days in NYC and I am pretty much cramming everything I possibly can it. I don't want to wear myself out but I don't want to come home knowing I could have seen more or should have done something.

With all my travel plans this year, I just want to go now!! Only 7 weeks till my cruise - which I am super excited for and dreading at the same time.. only coz I don't want to be sea sick the entire time! Then it is my Chch weekend - Oh man did I get a good deal for that!! I was worried that I might not be able to go because the flights were over $400 return and I couldn't quite justify spending that on two days... but then Virgin had a sale and I managed to get flights for $188 return... Because the cruise & Chch have pretty much organise themselves I have been focusing on NYC... not so much Hawaii because a lot of that relies on other people... but NYC is all mine!!

I have been getting some great ideas from Michelle (my friend who lives there and where I will be staying for the price of some Arnotts Mint Slice biscuits!!) and from listening to some old podcasts from http://theboweryboys.blogspot.com.au/,. plus finding some awesome new blogs, including: http://theboweryboys.blogspot.com.au/.. I am pretty happy with what I have so far but there is always room for change!

Travel Plans Updated

Ok so last time I wrote about a month ago, I was all for BNE-HNL-LAS-BNE.. well this has changed.. now it's BNE-HNL-NYC-BNE! Yes, that's right folks.. it looks like NYC is back on the books... the best bit is that a friend of a friend lives in NYC and has offer my her couch for the time I am there! How brilliant is that!! So now I just gotta get there :)

I have been looking at different options and funnily enough the best price I could find was actually two return flights - that is BNE-HNL-BNE and HNL-NYC-HNL. Doing it that way means I save about $300. Only thing is that I would have to spend another night in HNL on the way back but I was thinking that since the flights gets in to HNL about 1600 and leaves again at 0815 the next morning, I might just bunk down at the airport. I mean it would be a bit ridiculous to spend $120 on a room when you are only there for a matter of hours, especially coz you will probably need to be at the airport 2-3 hours before your 0815 flight!!

I have also been looking at different things to do in NYC. I am still limited funds wise so I need to know how much the whole thing is gonna cost me in the long run. I really want to get the accommodation in Hawaii sorted - or at least the deposit paid as soon as I can. Of course I also have to factor in that in 60 sleeps I am off on the cruise so I want spending money for that; I have to also get my tickets to Chch for Sept and of course my airfares for the US. Plus I need to remember I am going home in January and need airfares & car hire there too...

Oh so many things but I know that if I can pull it all off - then this year will be an amazing year for me and that is what I want. No point sitting back waiting for things to happen - you gotta get out there and make them happen!

Planning is part of the fun...

So many trips this year, so little time and so little money!!!

Here we go:

88 Sleeps - the South Pacific Cruise... rather excited about this.. I think I will be horribly sick but at the same time, really excited that I am actually doing it. And for Brooke's 18th too, that's really exciting as well. We will be in Vanuatu for her actual birthday - how many kids can say that aye! What did you do for your 18th? Oh went to Vanuatu for the day!! Haha brilliant. I have no idea what to expect on this cruise but I am pretty excited at the same time. Only one more payment for that and it's done & dusted then just gotta get spending money, but that's ok coz there is a couple of months to get that together....

267 Sleeps - HAWAII BABY!!!! So, so very excited about this!! I am more excited about going to Hawaii than my actual birthday tho but hey... it's Hawaii!!! Starting to get organised with that now - thinking about flights & accommodation etc. We have found the place we want to stay and I think it would be a good idea to start booking now - we have to pay a deposit of 30% for each room and then have till 30 days before arrival to pay the rest off. I reckon that's bloody good... I mean if you have 2 people to a room then it's half that. Now comes the part of trying to coordinate everyone.. most of us are in Brisbane so it's not too bad - just my niece in NZ to get together with. Mind you, you have to factor in everyone's leave etc too. I know when I want to go but it might not suit everyone else. Also figuring out how long to stay and whether I will be tacking on Vegas afterwards too... I have just done a quick costing and I reckon I can get flights for $1863 - that is BNE-HNL-LAS-BNE so I don't think that is actually too bad - considering it cost me about the same to go to London! I am looking at possibly 10 days in Hawaii and 5 days in Vegas. Have to look at finances but if I get the flights out of the way - which will be covered by my tax return so I can't book anything until July anyway - then its just the accommodation and spending that I need to worry about... oh and I want to hire a car for one day in Hawaii for my birthday - a red convertible

341 Sleeps - ok so technically this is 2013 but it's in January so close enough. This is for a friends wedding in NZ so plan on two weeks. Gotta look at flights for that soon and also need to book a car - which is ok coz you don't have to pay till you pick it up anyway but it's still an added expense when you are already paying for 2 trips this year... maybe a 3rd

So I have decided that I want to go home this year - I wasn't going to but I really want to and I have since found out that there is going to be an exhibit at the Canterbury Museum about the quakes and it's going to include things like the Cathedral Spire, the Timeball Station ball amongst other things. The exhibit is on from 22nd Feb to 01 Oct and I really want to go... so I have been looking at flights. Looking at 7-10 Sept because it is mums birthday on 4th and thought it was a good idea... also the 4th marks the 2 yr anniversary of the first quake so thought that was quite appropriate. Anyhoo, looking at that weekend means about $415 for a return flight.. so that's another amount that I really can't afford but can make happen if I really, really want to....

So what are your travel plans for this year?

Finally....

So a few weeks ago I was on Pinterest - which isn't unusual in itself, and I was looking at scrapbooking/journalling ideas and I found this link: 50 Things About Me - Two Peas in a Bucket. I loved the idea.. especially since this year I am turning 40... so I thought I would do a '40 things about me' page in my journal. I have been thinking about it for weeks but didn't really have that 'motivation', if you know what I mean. The other day I found the paper I wanted to use so pasted that in (not that you can see it now!) but then it took me another couple of days to actually do something about it.

And here it is.....

I have included 4 photos of me in various stages of life... 8 months old in 1973, 17 years old in 1989 (not that you could tell it was the 80's!!), 21 years old in 1993 and 38 years old in 2010. I wanted to leave room to be able to put a 40th birthday photo in but there wasn't enough, but that's not to say that when I get one I couldn't do something creative with it. The rest is just random things about me - places I love, songs that mean something, days that have had the most impact on my life, things that are important to me, etc

Actually, I am beginning to think that this book (it will become books as it's only February and I am nearly at the end of this one) is going to be important for me to do this year. I really wasn't looking forward to being 40 for so many reasons.. mainly because I really didn't think I would be where I am today. That's not to say I hate my life - sometimes I'm not very enthusiastic about it but I don't hate it. I do appreciate that I have a lot to be grateful for and I certainly haven't had a horrible life.. I guess if I am looking back at my life so far (yes I think I am heading towards a mid life crisis), I would have to say my life has been pretty average.

Not that being average isn't a bad thing but sometimes I just wish for something more exciting. Mind you, as my mother says "you can't have excitement every day". It's true - I guess there is nothing wrong with the mundane.. at least you still are alive aye?